LEARN TO LISTEN

Monday, April 28, 2008

For years I have struggled with listening to someone’s story without telling one of my own. I can’t seem to do it. I don’t want to do it—or at least I tell myself that I don’t—but I always end up doing it. I think the problem comes from years of preaching. I feel that I must be able to give people an answer for their problems. Goodness gracious, when will I ever learn that people don’t want to hear my sad story—especially if it tops theirs!

Empathy is what people want. They want us to understand. And we cannot understand unless we listen with the intent to understand instead of the intent to reply.

We can’t have empathy unless we take the time to listen. This is tough! Most of us want others to take the time to listen to our stories but we don’t want to listen to theirs. I’m working on this. I’m trying to learn to keep my big mouth shut and just listen—listen with the intent to understand, not reply!