CAN YOU TELL A JOKE?

Thursday, November 02, 2006

The real question is not, “Can you tell a joke?” but “Can you tell a joke right?” That is, can you tell a joke so it is funny?

Senator John Kerry cannot tell a joke!

My sister-in-law could not tell a joke. She rarely ever tried. My brother and I were shocked one day when out of the blue she asked, “Do you know what the Indian said when his dog fell over the cliff?” We smiled at each other and admitted we didn’t know. She quickly blurted out, “Dead dog!” “Dead dog?” what’s funny about that?” Now she was shocked. “Oh, I meant to say, Dog gone!”

I never heard her tell another joke.

John Kerry needs to learn a lesson from my sister-in-law. However, her misfire was funnier than if she had told the joke the right way. John Kerry’s failure at joke telling was a disaster.

BE YOURSELF

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

My homiletic professor at Abilene Christian encouraged young preachers to be themselves. He knew the tendency to try to act like and sound like older, respected preachers. He told us to just be ourselves and that we would communicate the Word of God forcefully and sincerely. This is good advice not just for preachers but for everyone. We just need to be who we are instead of always trying to be somebody else. Many times we do this in an effort to please other people. Stop it! Be who you are! Be the best you can be, but be real.

In his excellent book, Truman, David McCullough says this about people from Missouri: “…they could be tough, courageous, blunt, touchy, narrow-minded, intolerant, and quarrelsome.” I do not know a lot of people from Missouri but two I do know fit this description perfectly. Radio talk show host, Rush Limbaugh and my friend Paul Covey are from Missouri and what McCullough said about people from Missouri describes them both.

Rush is a fantastic communicator and is beloved by millions. At the same time he is probably despised by an equal number. That’s the way it is with people that are tough, courageous, blunt, touchy, narrow-minded, intolerant and quarrelsome. So be it. If Rush tried to be somebody he is not, we would turn him off. The ones who dislike him would not start liking him, even if he changed. My friend Paul is an elder in the church. He is effective only when he is being who he really is. Occasionally, because of critics, he tries to be somebody else. He loses his effectiveness. We all need to be who we are. There is a lot of stuff that goes into making us who we are—like being from Missouri.

I’m not from Missouri but I like who I am and I am going to continue to be me. You don’t like me? Ok. I wish you did but I’m not going to change for you because it wouldn’t do any good. As the old song says, “I gotta be me…”. I’m having fun and I have no desire to change—not even for you.

UNITY

Tuesday, October 31, 2006

"In the movie Lawrence of Arabia, there is a scene where Thomas Edward Lawrence, the English colonel who helped organize the Arab revolt against Turkey, tells his Arab counterpart, 'If the desert tribes do not unite as a nation they will be forever destined to be a silly and inconsequential people.' We face the same alternatives in our churches." – Preaching Now, October 31, 2006

The Churches of Christ and Christian Churches came into existence as a unity movement. The desire was to go back to the Bible and let the church be the church of the New Testament. The motto was: “Speak where the Bible speaks and be silent where the Bible is silent.” All this was good—very good. However, today the Churches of Christ/Christian Churches are among the most divided in the world. Some of these churches are trying to at least unite these two groups—the Churches of Christ and the Independent Christian Churches. But still many oppose even this.

If things do not change we are forever destined to be a silly and inconsequential people.

HALLOWEEN

Monday, October 30, 2006

The lights will be on and my wife will go to the door with candy. I would go but I just can’t get into the spirit of Halloween. I never know what to say to the little “devils.” I can’t bring myself to say, “O how cute” because I don’t think they are. I can’t act afraid because I’m not, until the six foot teenagers show up. I’m just not believable—so I send Charlotte to the door with her gracious smile and genuine welcome.

I wish Halloween would go away and never come back. But it’s not going to. It’s here to stay. We could turn off all the lights and pretend not to be home. We could make our neighbors think we are better than they are. We could say to them, “We will participate with you only on our terms.” But since we do not believe that Halloween is evil and that one night does not a pagan make, we cooperate. Well, the truth is, Charlotte cooperates—I tolerate it.

Another thing I don’t like about Halloween is I usually gain a few pounds. We buy the candy early and then I sample it to make sure it’s good enough for the little terrorists. And then we usually have some left over and I eat that to avoid waste. But this year we have not opened the candy early. Last year there wasn’t much left over and hopefully it will be the same this year.

Tomorrow night the lights will be on and Charlotte will be waiting. Come and get it kids!

STARBUCKS, CLIF'S MAN LAW

Sunday, October 29, 2006

Starbucks is planning to increase their stores to 40,000.

WE DO NOT NEED A STARBUCKS ON EVERY CORNER. CLIF'S MAN LAW

THERE IS A GOD

Saturday, October 28, 2006

Theologian Daniel Hawk said, “The basic human problem is that everyone believes that there is a God and I am it.”

Yes, that is a problem: we believe we are God or at least at times we act like it.

Listen to these words from God found in the Book of Job: “Have you ever given orders to the morning, or shown the dawn its place?…What is the abode of light? And where does darkness reside?...Have you entered the storehouses of the snow or seen the storehouses of the hail?…What is the way to the place where the lightening is dispersed?…Do you give the horse his strength or clothe his neck with a flowing mane?…Does the hawk take flight by your wisdom and spread his wings toward the south?…Does the eagle soar at your command and build his nest on high?…Will the one who contends with the Almighty correct him? Let him who accuses God answer him!”

My answer: “There is a God and I’m not Him!"