THE PRACTICE OF ENCOUNTERING OTHERS

Thursday, April 15, 2010

(I love these wise words from Barbara Brown Taylor)

The next time you go to the grocery store, try engaging the cashier. You do not have to invite her home for lunch or anything, but take a look at her face while she is trying to find "arugula" on her laminated list of produce.

Here is someone who exists even when she is not ringing up your groceries, as hard as that may be for you to imagine. She is someone's daughter, maybe someone's mother as well. She has a home she returns to when she hangs up her apron here, a kitchen that smells of last night's supper, a bed where she occasionally lies awake at night wresting with her own demons and angels. Do not go too far with this or your risk turning her into a character in your own novel, which is a large part of her problem already. It is enough for you to acknowledge her when she hands you your change.

"You saved eleven dollars and six cents by shopping at Winn Dixie today," she says, looking right at you. All that is required of you is to look back. Just meet her eyes for a moment when you say, "Thanks." Sometimes that is all another person needs to know that she has been seen--not the cashier but the person--but even if she does not seem to notice, the encounter has occurred. You noticed, and because you did, neither of you will ever be quite the same.